Time to see if one of the Blogosphere's mightiest contenders for the (fictional) Procrastination Award can pass this most ultimate of Procrastination Tests.
1. It was actually quite difficult for me to think of an initial fact.
2. The alias "justverydifferent" has been with me since 2003, and is in fact a homage to my magnus opei's surrogate title "A Very Different Story".
3. My previous alias, to my utter geeky shame, was "linked2zelda". Scoff and piss yourself laughing as you so please. I certainly do.
4. My magnus opei is still very unfinished, to my disappointment.
5. Disappointment seems to be the emotion I most commonly feel when I should, in fact, be foaming at the mouth with anger.
6. I currently have Pharyngitis. Tad disappointing. Yay.
7. I may or may not have Polycystic Ovary Syndrome. Another yay.
8. I have three out of three major symptoms of Polycystic Ovary Syndrome- those symptoms being acne, irregular bleeds, and being overweight- but the ultrasound and blood tests I had when I was sixteen found absolutely nothing, except that I was a little bit dehydrated at the time of the test.
9. Blood tests are the amalgamation of my two greatest phobias: needles (or any sort of medical equipment to be used on me), and my own blood leaving me from a non-self inflicted wound.
10. People find it very surprising, given my love of violence and related demented things, that I have these phobias.
11. People also find it very surprising that I am not even remotely vegetarian.
12. I used to be really afraid of the dark when I was little. For example, if the bathroom was dark at night, I would not go until the morning.
13. What I was really afraid of was the possibility of Roswell Greys hiding in said darkness, and the attached possibility of being abducted by them.
14. This fear may or may not have been planted by the "Mysterious Mysteries" like shows I used to watch at that age.
15. I still find it unnerving to swim in dark seawater, despite how much I love swimming.
16. Yes, Mel loves swimming. Outside.
17. Said state of being unnerved by dark water was not planted by watching "Jaws", as I am still yet to see it.
18. I love great white sharks. They're like the Tyrannosaurus Rex of today's oceans.
19. My favourite dinosaur just so happens to be Tyrannosaurus Rex.
20. For a while now I have been trying to subtly disseminate the false rumour that T-Rexes actually used their useless two-fingered front limbs to communicate with a special T-Rex sign language.
21. This rumour hasn't gone very far, which makes me sad.
22. I used to cry at the drop of a hat when I was younger, and over pointless things too.
23. Mumsie eventually cracked the shits and told me to grow up when I cried over some sick goldfish. Ever since I have been a rather stoic, bottled-up kind of person.
24. Yes, I call my mother Mumsie.
25. I don't have a nickname for my dad. He hasn't really been around the family environment long enough for a nickname to develop. OOOOOOH. Burn.
26. My parents split up when I was in Year Five (or eleven years old).
27. Both of my parents are lazy, so they didn't get the official divorce-related paperwork until about six years later.
28. I am also somewhat lazy. More rather, make that very lazy.
29. For some odd reason, (see fact 26) I remember events in school according to school years, instead of my own age. I find it very hard to remember it any other way, and I think this gives my school a little more credit than I'd like.
30. I went to a tyrannically Anglican eastern suburbs private girls school. It's name was St. Catherine's, and it sucked.
31. Said school is over 150 years old now. 151 years old, to be precise.
32. I, in direct contrast to this religion-laced education, am a raging atheist/Laveyian Satanist.
33. Mess with the atheists on campus (at Macquarie Uni), and they will subtly sic me onto your religious propaganda like this! *clicks!*
34. My favourite prank so far has been arranging god-bothering posters into inverted cross arrangements. This really scares the bejesus out of the people who put said posters up.
35. I once ran for University Council. I wore a sweet hat in my photo and pulled over 300 votes.
36. I was surprised that anyone other than myself voted for me willingly, let alone over 300 voters. Maybe it was the sweet hat.
37. Speaking of sweet hats, I had a three second relationship with Keith Flint from the Prodigy. It was the sweet hat that caught his eye.
38. I now have three sweet hats.
39. Fortunately, I don't have three sweet tumours to match. HAHA CANCER JOKE.
40. I am allowed to make cancer jokes because my grandfather on my dad's side died of prostate cancer.
41. I'm also allowed to make them because I like unPC humour. As long as it is HUMOUROUS though.
42. My grandfather was a very paranoid person, who was so obsessed about his eventual death that I wouldn't be surprised if the paranoid stress had invited the cancer in.
43. This particular grandfather's funeral was the only big family ceremony that I did not write a poem for.
44. The poem I wrote for my other grandfather's funeral made everyone cry. And I mean everyone.
45. By the way, I have been told that I am a fantastic writer.
46. I build my opinions of myself largely on the feedback I am given by the people around me, because when it comes to the topic of myself, I am somewhat biased. Hence "I have been told that I am a fantastic writer" instead of "I am a fantastic writer".
47. The nothing but awesome feedback I have recieved thus far means I have iron cast self-esteem. Thanks guys! :)
48. Confidence in my body though, not so much. Cough.
49. I am also a grammar/spelling Nazi.
50. I will type perfectly even when I am so drunk that I cannot get up. Tested and true!
51. I have had one hangover. It was nasty and moonshine-related.
52. I get very very friendly when drunk.
53. Apparently I also ooze testerone and sex whilst drunk, which I find amusing.
54. Said oozing has given me a girl pashes to boy pashes ratio of 3:2. It also scored me a great throbbing black hicky, of female origin.
55. Said oozing, however, has never gotten Mel laid. Which is sad for all who are not involved.
56. I occasionally switch from first to third person. I'm not sure what the switch depends on.
57. I have not worn a dress or a skirt since I was eleven years old. Even before then, I wasn't so keen on them.
58. I haven't really seen a dress or skirt I'm even marginally tempted to wear since.
59. I once went through a surfie phase where I wore nothing but brightly coloured Mambo T-shirts and shorts.
60. I'm still partially (and secretly) fond of Mambo-related art- particularly the older stuff.
61. Surrealism would have to be my favourite art movement, though I'm a big fan of post-modern art too.
62. My favourite artist is the delightfully moustachioed Salvador Dali, followed by Man Ray, Stelarc, H.R Giger, Jhonen Vasquez, Andy Goldsworthy, Todd Lockwood and that guy who does all the art for the Discworld series. *cannot be arsed to get up and find the artist's name in her Art of Discworld book*
63. I find facial hair, particularly well-groomed and diabolical-looking moustaches and goatees, so attractive that it hurts.
64. I also have a bit of an Asian fetish. UNDERSTATEMENT.
65. I am also quite renowned for loving bondage and various other kinks in a most enthusiastic manner.
66. I love animals, especially reptiles, with equal enthusiasm. Exceptions are rabbits, rats and cats. I love them less because they go feral and screw with the other animals out there.
67. I've grown an immunity to cat, seeing I now know more cat-people than I thought was possible.
68. One of my guiltiest pleasures is the odd morsel of scaly bondage porn.
69. When asked whether I'm a cat or dog person, I usually say that I'm, in fact, a bird-person.
70. My longest lasting friendship is with my nine year old cockateil Maxo. She's turning ten this year in September :)
71. During the first two years of owning Maxo, I thought she was a male (because the petshop owners told us so). But then she laid an egg and that perception had to change lol.
72. Another one of those bizarre guilty pleasures I have is listening to videogame music.
73. My favourite game ever is, as my terrible previous alias suggests, the Legend of Zelda: The Ocarina of Time. It wasn't a game- it was a way of life.
74. I also am an avid fan of Metroid, Super Smash Brothers, Enter the Matrix, old school Mario Brothers, Warcraft, Age of Empires, Elder Scrolls, Baldur's Gate, Neverwinter Nights, Icewind Dale, the Sims 2, Carmageddon and Silent Hill games.
75. I also really loved this crazy old game called Sweevo's World. So far Liam and my dad are the only other people I know who have heard of it, let alone played it.
76. Fact 68 reminded me that I'm cold-blooded. My blood temperature sits about a degree and a half lower than the average human being's. This means I feel the cold easier and am feverish at a deceptively low temperature, and explains how the hell I manage to occasionally wear a long coat in summer.
77. I have the constitution of a dwarf. It takes a lot of alcohol, and a lot of mixing alcohol, to take me down.
78. Said constitution allowed me to merely sleep off a urinary tract infection. Which was nice.
79. My first shot ever was Czech plum brandy, also known as Slivovice. It smelt like plum, but tasted like paint thinner. I took it like a man. No, make that a dwarf.
80. I have a really mixed heritage. My dad's side is Scottish and Welsh, whilst my mother's side is Czech, Polish and Russian. The Czech blood is the most prominent, apparently.
81. I may need to research into this more, but apparently I am related to the brother of the last Polish Tsar. This brother however betrayed said Tsar, and so doesn't get any of the inheritance. Whoops!
82. Despite Czech heritage, I am allergic to cabbage, a great Czech delicacy.
83. I'm also allergic to mushrooms, corn, cranberries, and lamb.
84. My favourite Czech dish is Smazeny Syr. It's pretty much just a hunk of Edam cheese breadcrumbed and deep fried, and served with tartare sauce (just in case the DEEPFRIED CHEESE didn't lubricate your innards with enough oil).
85. I don't have this dish very often, because your body dies a little bit of cholesterol poisoning every time you have it lol.
86. I am so very achingly close to a full 100 facts now.
87. I'm known to blather a lot, so that isn't very surprising.
88. I currently have about 16 GB of music- which translates to something over 3500 tracks.
89. About one hundred of these tracks are Invader Zim audio clips.
90. I listen to a broad range of music. From Indie to Techno to Goth to Metal to Rock to Trip-Hop to Low-Fi to Classical to World music, I have some of it... somewhere.
91. I cannot bear to listen to music with voices that shit me. This rules out a lot of Emo, the entirety of commerical Rap and also a lot of Indie stuff too.
92. The three bands that got me into music at all were System of a Down, Daft Punk and Fatboy Slim. Then I went Prodigy crazy.
93. The music genre I most comfortably listen to is Industrial.
94. My favourite album at the moment is Year Zero by Nine Inch Nails.
95. Though I don't really have a singular favourite track now, my favourite track used to be Go by Andy Hunter.
96. I was mortified when I discovered this track was written by a devoutly Christian DJ, bit still continued to love it to bits.
97. I have seen Opeth, Nine Inch Nails, the Prodigy, Static-X, Ill Nino, MM9, Cog, System of a Down, the Chemical Brothers, Mudvayne, the White Stripes, Iggy Pop, the Beastie Boys, and Slipknot live.
98. My first concert was Johnny Farnham's "Man of the Hour" tour, but I don't talk about that. I was accompanying my mother.
99. As you may or may not know, I started my LiveJournal account on the four year anniversary of Sept-11.
100. This is the 140th time I've posted.
Mwa hahaha. I win!
Mel, Queen of Dark Lizards and Lizardy Darkness